God’s Hands

His hand is big. His hand is powerful. We are His children. Let us lay our hands in His. Because His hand is big. Big enough for us to take refuge in. Big enough for us to curl in.There is no safer place than in His hands. They are so much larger than our insurmountable obstacles in life combined. So much larger than our seemingly big unsolvable problems. The impossibles have become possible. With His kind living Words and His good Works. And through faith in us. Praise be to Him now and forever! Because His hands do great things! Unthinkable and unimaginable great things…

Our hands in His...

Our hands in His...

Happy Sunday and be blessed.. πŸ™‚


Rojak lagik

Having the urge to post something here tonight. Although my head is totally blank of what to write/type. So.. again.. we rojak together2 okies πŸ˜€ . Plus, our TV rosak since yesterday. No image, just sound coming out from the TV. So no other entertainment for me at the moment beside surfing the net and merapu in here. See.. intro pon dah panjang.. Ya sia sukkk!! Ngee~~ πŸ˜› Plus lagik, it’s the last day of the month. Time really flies huh.. dah masuk March, and we have another 10 months before we enter the year 2010. I wonder what will happen to me by 2010. Life memang penuh mystery kan.. Huhu.

One of my resolutions of the year.. yang jogging2 tu ba.. lama dah terkubur.. see.. kan dah cakap da.. hahahaha malooo~~~ Fortunately, this blog is still alive.. and hopefully will have long life.. until me tua mamau having lost the ability to type. Although at that time I’ll have the skills of talking crap at PhD level. Haha.. Hurm.. mesti best kan if orang mamau blogging..kirkkkk…

Anyway, I haven’t got the offer letter from Brooke Dockyard. I have been to and fro from the post office this morning to check if it’s already here or not. Frust T_T

Seriously, no idea da 😦 How?? I nyanyi2 seja in my heart k.. sebab my voice tak sodap.. I’m scared Betong hujan lagik. And banjir.. And Prince have to do banjir report lagik.. Cian.. So so.. Gudnite.. πŸ˜›

This time lagu BM k.. Nawar, me pinjam ur lagu.. Hehe. Layan~~

Ku Merindu – Ella feat Shah

Ku merindu,
Merindu cinta yang tulus dari hatimu
Selalu ku impikan hidup bersamamu
Ku kan selalu menanti balasan cintamu

Ku berjanji,
Berjanji mencintaimu sepenuh jiwaku
Ku tak akan mendustakan cinta kekasihku
Agar kau dapat menerima cintaku

Ku selalu, merindu cintamu
Yang selalu ada di jiwaku

Aku tahu kau pun cinta
Tapi malu tuk berkata
Usah kau ragui cintaku
Ku tetap merindu

Aku tahu kau pun cinta
Tapi malu tuk berkata
Ku tunggu jawapan cintamu
Ku tetap merindu

Di saat ini hatiku rindu belaian cinta darimu
Ku harap kau merestui cinta dariku
Yang selalu setia menunggu dirimu…

PS: Too many ‘cinta’ words in this song. Buwekk…

Christian publications can use ‘Allah’ on condition

Before golek-ing, I accidentally tjumpa this article in the NST. Reminds me of what Mr Wilson has told us few weeks ago about the use of Allah in the church.

Christian publications are now allowed to use the word “Allah” as long as they state that the materials are only meant for Christians.

Home Ministry Quran Publication Control and Text Division secretary Che Din Yusoh said the move which came into effect on Feb 16 followed the gazettement of the cabinet’s decision in 1986.

The cabinet’s decision was that Christian publications were banned from using four words – Allah, Baitullah, Kaabah and solat (prayer) – unless the publications clearly stated that the materials were only meant for Christian followers.

“We decided to gazette the move recently. However, those who failed to adhere to this condition will have their publications seized by the ministry’s enforcement officers.

“We will be firm to ensure compliance. It is only fair that they adhere to it,” he said.

Reverend Lawrence Andrew, the editor of the Catholic Church’s The Herald, was quoted by a news portal as saying that the ministry is allowing the publications to use “Allah” to refer to God as long as they state that the material is only meant for Christians.

The controversy first broke out in late 2007 when the government banned the use of β€œAllah” in Christian Malay-language texts because it allegedly might confuse Muslims.

The Herald has challenged the ban in court.

The Herald publishes in English, Mandarin, Tamil and Bahasa Malaysia to cater to its multi-ethnic faithful. It has a circulation of 14,000 copies.

Merapu shortly

Friday da???????? Copat kan!!!!! Liplapliplap… Da abis 1 weekkkk…Kirrrkkkk… Macam baru2 seja me poco-poco that day. And here comes another weekend. Oh yeahhh… Hurm, today I have no lepak plan. Stay in the house seja la this hot afternun.. Surf2 tenet (Seb baekkk tenet OK!). And kacau my kucing tdo. Wahahahahaha (evil laugh!)

I am abit in dilemma right now. But not at the maximum level yet. It has yet to come. Yesterday, I received a phone call from Brooke (nama glamm nya.. ) and yes, I did get the job. Praise God! And the offer letter is now on the way to Betong from Kuching. Hopefully it will reach our post box tomorrow so that I can have enough time to think about it (dilemma tahap maxxx will happen once I got the offer letter in hand). I have to confirm with the Brooke on this coming Tuesday if I am to accept their offer. There’s alot of things to think about.. And the most disturbing issue is accommodation. Where am I going to stay? Sejingkat. It’s one of the most dangerous places in Kuching, that’s what I’ve been told. Huhu. But I think my Mum worry more than I am. Yesterday, bulih she use the facial cleanser as her shampoo?? Kuikuikui. She’s worrier no 1. Huh!!

Neway, hepi weekend everyone! Me want to golek2 for a while.. Ngee~~ πŸ˜›

What about now- Daughtry

I have the feeling that I’m going to leave Betong soon. When I just started to feel comfortable and made a lot of frens. Talking of nomad, I think I am no difference from one. But demi my own future and career and orang Iban (kirkk… πŸ˜› ), I have to… 😦

Anyway, I’ll just tempek this video here. This song really touch my heart… See the real video clip in YouTube. I can’t find the original video clip with embed enabled.


Short talk:

Can we just simply change our signatures?? Mine is too complicated I sometimes forgot and stuck in the middle of ‘menconteng’ the signature T_T


I have no mood to blog but I want to tip tap tip tip tap the laptop. And am thinking of sending my laptop to the workshop tomorrow to get it repaired. Haih.. since that day lagik mau repair, but tak repair2 jugak.. Why?? Cause I am a successful procrastinator. Ngee~~ So.. hopefully I can reach my 30 posts target before the month ends this Saturday.

Let’s talk about nicknames. Good and bad ones. Hihi. I have lots of them since I was little kid. Most of them are for the teasing purposes. To menyakitkan my hati. You’ll know if you are the youngest and the only daughter in the family. Jadi bahan buli. Huhu. So which one should we start with? The bad or the good ones?? I’ll vote for the good ones yeah.. Hehe.

So, here is the list of the good ones:

  1. Shan – The most popular one. Hehe. Being called by this name by my close friends, and family since I was super small (time kija part time model Fab). I dunno where the ‘n’ at the end of the name came from. Maybe at that time Shanmugam tengah meletoppp.. the long distance runner, remember?? Ngee~
  2. Mang – My name at home. Being used by my parents (only!). If my bro call me using this name, rasa pelik T_T
  3. Sha – My name in KMS. And in Ulu Kapit. Sometimes, if they can pronounce my full name well, they will add the Haf at the beginning. Huhu. Anyway, it’s alway hard to pronounce my own name when I’m introducing myself to someone. So I can’t blame anyone if they can’t get my name right for the first 10 times. Or 100 times. Hehe. So how did I explain it to them? By taking the perumpamaan of Mega Sale ” Half Price, Half Price”. Hahaha. Sot~~
  4. Pesa – Just between me and Effa. She’s Epot by the way. Ngee~
  5. Odie – Just between me and Edelyn. She’s Gapel (Garfield) and me the Odie.
  6. Endun?? – Mr Wilson seja panggil me by this name T_T But I’m sure he’ll get my name right soon. Tehee.
  7. Ohhh.. how can I forgot this one name. PLUM! Hehe. Thanks Banana. I’m not sure why am I Plum. Ask my frens, Meli, Janice, Liyen, Chenglu etc. Hehe. We have this one special group we have created just for fun. There are Plum, Banana, Strawberry, Orange, Grape, Apple, Durian.. Hurm.. Janice, what are you? Me forgot la.. Huhu. Sorry. I think I drank too much Nescafe I always forgot things. So, anyone wants to join our fruits gang?? Tehee.

I think that’s all for the good ones. The bad ones are:

  1. Tampoi – This name is the most menyakitkan my hati! Do you know what does it mean? Tempat budak kicik berak tu baa.. πŸ˜› Sapa yang kasik?? Tidak lain tidak bukan my second bro. Huh!! Bincik bincik!!! He called me by this name for yearsss. Tampoi! Tampoi! The origin of the name?? Huhu. Sia pura-pura tak ingat bulih??? Ngee~~ But now no more. Baguss!! If not, memang perang besar Jalan Bebangai ini. Sia gangster ba.. Hahaha πŸ˜›
  2. Tambi Geley – I like this one particular song last time.. Ala-ala dangdut gitu.. So, sama jugak. My second bro kasik me this name. My first bro ikut seja. Not as popular and long as the tampoi.
  3. Shan Nunok – Uhm.. Me pura-pura to forget lagik OK. Maloo mau share. Kirrkkkk…
  4. Empeliau – I think it’s a monkey name. Given by my Dad. All three of us have one each. Nyumbuh for the eldest. Engkiong for the second. Haha. Kaki Kling bisi engkiong! Kuikuikui.



  5. Limbing – Gossip lama ~_~ Each one of us ada. Pudai for the eldest. Empaka for the second. No longer in use la.. Hehe.

OK da.. That’s all that I can recall for now. Will add some more if happen I t’recall lagik. Actually balance jugak my good and bad nicknames kan.. Maybe because of kesakitan hati, which make me rasa the bad nicknames banyak. Huhu.

Hurm.. next time if you see me anywhere, jan plak korang tampoi2 ngan me ek.. Hehe.

Gudnite and sweet dreams πŸ™‚

Bebola boolattt

Short talk:

Consumer advice: Go for the less advertised products. Example is this Eversoft facial cleanser πŸ˜› Hahaha. Iklan… πŸ˜›

Forever soft.. hihiks..

Forever soft.. hihiks..


Me lindoo my blog so much. Celcom Broadband tak salu baguih. So tarik balek all my pujian on this broadband. Hopefully Kiew Leng read my this post. Hehe. So, Deconnexion (like that ka spell nya??) and Broadband sama seja.. Maybe it depends on tempat kan.. Since my house in the middle of ‘nowhere’, so broadband pon sot~~.

Today, just like other normal days. No interesting things happened today. Just this morning my sakit kepala yang teramat. Tahan seja la.. Since my timetables for today pack tahap maxXx.. From 7am till 1.20pm, I only have 2 free periods. So, weng weng since this morning with kerenah budak. Sambil baham 2 tablets of Paracetamol. Huh.. I think I consumed too much drug for the past few weeks. Thinking of my body being full with toxic and drug.. it drove me to this one idea. Carik kuncu2 to play basketball. Why basketball? Cause it’s hard to find suitable court for other games, like Badminton etc. Plus, it’s not fun to play with strangers. Hehe. So far, it’s only me and Gapel. But I’m sure can ajak alot more. Ada lagik yang mau join?

ball Uncle Wilson.. Ngee~~ :P

ball Uncle Wilson.. Ngee~~ πŸ˜›

So, after the last class, instead of went straight back home, I went to town. To sebey the price of the ball. Hehe. And the short reports are:

  • Shop 1: It cost RM 129. Conditions: New and still kempis.
  • Shop 2: Cost RM 49. Conditions: Er.. Cam dah kena pakai seja.. kotor2.
  • Shop 3: Rm 68. Conditions: New but da ditiup boolattt..

Shop no 1 memang lebey2 kan. But I don’t really know la.. Cause I never know what the standard price for this ball. And maybe it depends on brand too. Anyone has any idea of the price and brand you want to share about this bola-bola? Gugugugu.

So, I’ll decide tomorrow to buy or not to buy. And which shop I should get it from. Moreover, tomorrow’s Gomen’s workers bday kan??? Hahahahahahaha.

Hepi Bday to all Gomen’s workers and anyone yg dapat gaji esok!! Kuikuikui πŸ˜›

I feel less jumpy tonite so my blog pon a bit boring. Dunno why. Gudnite and have a good night sleep.. Sweet dreams.. Have a nice and sweet Wednesday.. Apa lagik?? Ngee~~

Healing for a Broken Heart

A copy-and-paste sharing from KnowJesus.com website…

One of the most painful emotional experiences is that of a “broken heart” whether it be from a severed relationship or the death of a loved one. Everyone has to deal with a broken heart at some point in life because we live in a fallen world, and, as a result, we are constantly faced with shattered dreams, unexpected losses, and hurting relationships.

For ages, songwriters have tried to capture the heart-wrenching feelings that arise from these circumstances with lyrics like, “How I am supposed to live without you when all I’ve been living for is gone?” and “I ‘ll never get over you getting over me;” as well as “You’ve lost that loving feeling.” Yet, these emotions are not articulated as clearly as we often wish they were. Often the pain is so deep, and so excruciating that we tend to repress and deny the anguish rather than handle it properly.

But God gives hope to all those who suffer from a broken heart by promising both His abiding presence and His overflowing peace. Psalm 34:18 says that the Lord “is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” In John 14:27 Jesus states, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you . . . Do not let your hearts be troubled.”

Right now God can use you even in your heartache. In II Corinthians 1:3-4 Paul writes, “Praise be to God . . . the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.” Sometimes the very reason pain has been allowed into our lives is so that we can be more effective in our ministry to others.

Consider this: Can she who has never felt rejection and isolation understand the plight of a woman who battles depression and loneliness? Can he who has never lost a loved one empathize with a man who has just lost his father? Can she who has never known the pain of unrequited love minister to the teenager whose love interest has chosen someone else for a prom date?

God’s purposes in allowing pain in our lives are multi-faceted. Not only does He teach us about His love and faithfulness amidst our times of sorrow, but after our grieving has ended, He gives us strength to offer words of edification to others who are experiencing similar trials. I Peter 5:9 says, ” . . . Your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.” Thus, we serve as both a support base and a hope for those who are walking through difficult situations proving that with God’s help even seemingly insurmountable obstacles can be overcome.

If you are struggling with emotional pain, take comfort in the fact that God has your situation as well as you in the palm of His hands. He will not let you go, and He will not let you down. A final word of hope can be found in I Peter 5:10, “And the God of all grace, who called you . . . , after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, form, and steadfast.” Take heart, the pain you experience today may be your platform for ministry tomorrow.

πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ Smile.. πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚


Tonight, a mix of feelings 😦

Tired+Sleepy+Homesick+Sad = ????

Jadi apa?? Tiredness is expected. Dah poco-poco kan. Ngee~~ Homesick. I know it’s weird, because I am now at home. But the feeling is exactly the same to that of how I felt last time when I was in MRSM and KMS. Not all the time homesick la.. Just awal-awal di tempat baru. Maybe because my Mum wasn’t around for the past few days. She went to Penang to attend my cousin’s wedding. And I’ve never met this cousin and her whole family in my entire life. Just the mom, who is my Aunty. I can’t even picture their faces in my head. Terokkan our talian persaudaraan (tali or talian?? Hantam seja la..). What to do.. Taik kambing da boolattt..

I have no specific topic to be discussed, goreng-ed, rapu-ed (sounds like raputtt..hihiks) tonight. Just feel like typing and adding more posts for this month. I’ll set my own target for this month. At least 30 posts?? Can ka?? Huhu.

Anyway, I have yet to conclude the rambles in my previous post. Regarding me having my own problems. So, my conclusion yang tidak seberapa is.. Life is not always so beautiful (well, from human’s view). It’s not always be like how you always want it to be (kehendak hati). But it can be beautiful when you think differently. By positive thinking? It’s like, if you used to see things from the west and it looks ugly, why don’t you change to the east direction?? (Merepek da me.. Hihi.. But still seriuss.. πŸ˜› ) Walo papa pon, there’s always a new starting point at the ugly ends. Don’t give up! But move on! You never know, but much better things await you. Because He knows better than you know yourself.

Bulih me bukak sarikat kaunseling?? Tehee.. Just words of encouragement for me myself and everyone. Cause no one is exceptional from problems+emotional = problemo.

On a totally unrelated subject, I was SMS-ing my ex-student, and she said I look like I’m 17 πŸ˜€ Waka waka..Β  I’ll take that as a compliment. Tehee.. That is 7 years younger than my real age. Weeee~~ (Pa kes??? <—-faveret words anak2 muda Betong.. kirrkkk πŸ˜› )

And one more.. Today, one week anniversary of Bear’s Rest-In-Peace. I’m so missing you Bear. Lain jak rasa rumah this week. Sunyi sepi 😦

OK dah.. I want to sleep early tonight. 7 hours sleep to have a complete eyes cycle. Is that how we call that sleeping process thingy?? Whatever la.. Huhu..

Since my Garfield status is now taken by Edelyn, and I am called Odie because she bully me alot (tipoo seja.. I’m the one yang gangster OK T_T), this is the new me kroh-ing.. Ngee~~

It's not the real Odie, but still cute kan.. Ngee.. :D Kroh Kroh Krohhh

It's not the real Odie, but still cute kan.. Ngee.. πŸ˜€ Kroh Kroh Krohhh

Gudnite dear frensss!! πŸ™‚ Have a Happy Merry Monday tomolo!! Hiks…

One hot Sunday afternoon

Short talk:

Have you ever seen ciken berak tak cirit? Am just wondering.. Sorry to disgust you awal-awal. Kuikui.

featherless chicken??? :/

featherless chicken??? :/


I just got back from my fren’s place. We did poco-poco just now. It was so fun I like. Hehe. I’ve never done poco-poco before (am so ashamed :/) coz I maloo tahap dewiii in front of others that I don’t really rapat with.. Hihik. We sweat like crazy. And rasa kurus jap.. Huhu. Kan best if there’s poco-poco class in Betong. I’ll definitely sign up to this class. Ngee~~ This bunch of frens of mine pon the most terer in mencarut, and me cam besa, blurr.. But we had good time πŸ˜›

While poco-poco-ing, I received an SMS from a fren, asking if is it OK for him to give my number to his fren (apparently, this guy is the owner of one of my faveret kedai makan in Betong. And Gapel (Edelyn) and Odie (me) had our lunch there today). I dunno how to say no, but I did say no in indirect way. Hehe. Good! It’s been ages since I last got things yang like this one. So rasa bebunga kijap la ati.. Ngee~~ But that’s it. Full stop. Because me dah serik. I don’t want to get involved in relationship that can’t promise a happy ending. Huhu. Yes, I have secrets and problems that I can’t share to just anyone. Not even my family 😦 . Not that I don’t trust you. Just because… Sorry.. But why am I writing them here now? Huhu. Just to let you know that I have my own problems too.. Huhu.

I’ll stop here. Mau golek2 kijap. Arrghhh.. cepat nya weekend abisss… 😦

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